First Steps And Options For Gay Men

Assisted Reproduction Options For Gay Men

Gay couples and single men can build their families today as never before using assisted reproduction by enlisting the help of egg donors and gestational carriers. At IRMS, we are well aware that embarking on this process can seem initially daunting.

For that reason, we have created a “First Steps” guide to help you on your path to parenthood.

First Steps

Most gay couples that come to IRMS tell us they have done on average over a year’s worth of research before finally sitting down with a reproductive endocrinologist. Most admit to having trouble discerning where and with whom to begin the process of building their family.

We recommend you start your journey at an IVF clinic that can assist you in getting the donor of your choice, the gestational carrier of your choice, as well as the right legal counsel.

The first step is to make a new patient appointment with one of our physicians while considering what options best suit you as a couple. We highly recommend putting your questions down on paper so that in your consult we cover all that you wish to cover.

Whether an infertile couple or a same sex couple the process is the same to start. We need to determine the status of your health and fertility so we are able to best define the cycle-type to optimize your chance of having a healthy baby. All couples undergoing any type of fertility treatment will go through a standard evaluation, including bloodwork and genetic testing. This will be true for both you and your Partner.

On the day of your new patient appointment you will meet with your IRMS physician, nurse and financial counselor. You are able to do your bloodwork that day to get your initial testing underway. You will be given a checklist of things that need to be completed prior to your course of treatment. Checklists vary from patient to patient depending on cycle-type and age.

Your IRMS team is here to help answer all of your questions and to help you navigate preparing for treatment and your cycle. Since your cycle will be based on an egg donor, a gestational carrier and the appropriate legal counsel to protect yourselves as the parents of the offspring from your cycle, these issues will be fully discussed in your new patient consult.

What to expect at your New Patient Appointment:
  • Meet with your IRMS physician to review your medical history and treatment options and desires
  • Meet with your nurse to discuss your checklist items that need to be completed before a cycle can be started
  • Meet with a financial counselor to review costs of treatment, insurance coverage and any and all financing options
  • Initial bloodwork for both partners

Gestational Carrier

Gestational Surrogate/Carrier is a woman who agrees to carry a pregnancy for another (Intended Parent). READ MORE ...


Egg Donor

When working with IRMS there are many options available to find the egg donor you seek. READ MORE ...



Many patients have questions about the financial, legal and emotional issues associated with fertility treatment. READ MORE ...

Thank you IRMS for the life you have created and the family you have given to us. As a same sex couple trying to conceive, our first exposure to the fertility world was beyond amazing! We felt very comfortable and accepted as we learned about the options for us.

After patiently counting down our two week wait, the best day for us was the phone call from an IRMS staff member letting us know that we were pregnant!!! It was one of the happiest days of our lives, next to getting married.
Candace, Carrie and Gianna
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